“I’m CEO, Bitch” – A “Social Network” Appreciation Post

January 11, 2011

The other month, my mother showed me an article that discussed the lack of good one-liners found in contemporary films – especially the big budget ones. I disagreed with her at first, citing Brokeback Mountain’s heartbreaking “I wish I knew how to quit you!” which I use quite often. But then I came to the realization that a.) that’s just me and b.) people really don’t quote movies anymore. That is, unless they are enthusiasts or Mean Girls fans.

So, off of that, I got to thinking. Again, maybe it’s just me, and also the fact that it’s probably my favorite movie of 2010, but quite honestly, I thought that The Social Network was full of great one-liners. The film, which comes out on DVD tomorrow (which is also my birthday) (wink wink, hint hint) circled around outstanding Harvard students – the lines were bound to be witty. And I mean, this is on top of everything else I liked about the film, including Andrew Garfield/Eduardo Saverin (that poor, doe-eyed creature), the setting (especially the dorm life, which made me even more excited for college than I already am), and the way it was told through flashback/flash forward (this is just a personal thing. Flashbacks are my favorite.)

But those lines man. The writers did an amazing job with this film. If anything, they deserve the Academy Award for best original screenplay. Yes, I did go see the film opening night, and yes, I was excited for the film (the trailers for it were ingenious), but I was not expecting to be so enthralled with the film. I left the theater with my jaw scraping the floor. I still can’t really begin to explain what it was that made me love it so much, but I do think it has something to do with the screenplay. I wished I had thought of half of it myself.

For example:

“I’m sorry! My Prada’s at the cleaners! Along with my hoodie and my fuck-you flip flops, you pretentious douchebag!” – Eduardo Saverin. I have the overwhelming desire to get into an argument with a certain friend of mine so that I’ll have the excuse to scream this at the top of my lungs.

“Lawyer up, asshole.” – Eduardo Saverin. Also this. Except not so much an argument – I want to issue this as a threat.

“I like standing next to you, Sean. It makes me look tough in comparison.” – Eduardo Saverin. Another great threat.

“You are going to go through life thinking that girls don’t like you because you’re a nerd. And I want you to know from the bottom of my heart that that wont be true. It’ll be because you’re an asshole.” – Erica Albright. What a whammy. The snide comment about Erica not having to study because she goes to BU made the whole audience gasp during the screening I went to, but that’s because it was full of Princeton students. This line, however, sent shivers down my spine. I wanted to stand up and pump my fist and yell “You go girl!” but I was in the front and that would have been obstructive and I hate the kinds of people who do things like that anyway.

Mark: I need you.
Eduardo: I’m here for you.
Mark: No I need the algorithm you used to rank chess players.
This part always just cracks me up.

“I’m six-five, two-twenty, and there’s two of me.” – Cameron Winklevoss. I also liked when Mark called them the Winklevii – classssic!!!

So what I’m really getting at is, If you haven’t seen the movie, rent it ASAP. It’s about to become my new Mean Girls.

"I was your only friend."


Hey Little Train

November 22, 2010

Don’t tell me this scene didn’t make you want to wrap Hermione in your arms, pull her to your chest and stroke her hair softly, whispering that everything was going to be alright.

For the Greater Good

November 20, 2010

So…Harry Potter. I’m still reeling from getting three hours of sleep Thursday night/Friday morning. It was so worth the time and energy. But where do I start? I can’t write a review because I just don’t have the time, and there’s so much to go over, but first of all I want to point out that everyone on that cast and crew deserves a huge round of applause for a job well done with everything. This is the first movie where I’ve been content with the scenes that they’ve left out (or inserted/changed), and it was also extremely beautiful and well done. In the first scene, before everyone meets up, when Hermione is with her parents, I wanted to bawl for her. I wanted to cry for her throughout the movie, from the time in the woods to Malfoy Manor, but to me, that beginning scene was unbearably poignant. Emma Watson did an amazing job this movie, and I think that’s because there was a lot more focus on Hermione’s character in The Deathly Hallows. I mean, a good majority of the book is just her and Harry, there has to be a focus on her. I never complained about the scene in the woods, as many of my peers and fellow Potter-lovers did, because I adore Hermione and liked to see her reaction to everything – she is the voice of reason in Harry’s world, and he couldn’t have survived while in hiding without her. Also, it’s crucial that she was there with Harry, or else she might have been exiled from the wizarding world on account of being muggle-born. A lot of that was hinted at and played into the character in the movie, I like to think, so, again, beautiful job, Emma Watson.

Many of the scenes that I was excited for were faithful and done impeccably well – for instance, the scene with Ron, Harry and the horcrux was almost exactly as I had imagined it, if not better. There are a few things that were left out that, while I’m upset about, I can accept that they had to water down for time’s sake. For instance, I was excited to see their bonding with Kreacher, it happened over time, and they didn’t have enough space to show the three of them drawing up plans to break into the  Ministry or making nice with Kreacher. I’ve come to accept that they can’t fit everything in, but I was impressed with how much they squeezed into this one. Perhaps that’s why I enjoyed it so much. Because they’re splitting this film into two parts, they can include so much more than usual. Throughout the screening, I was literally on the edge of my seat, gripping the sides of it. I began to doze off during the previews, but as soon as it started rolling, I was wide awake and brimming with excitement. For all 2 & 1/2 hours.

Just some side notes: The scenery was breathtaking. I had a burning desire to go to England throughout the film, it was so gorgeous. Hiding in places like that can’t be that bad. Also, Hermione had such nice clothing! I mean, I guess with that beaded bag it’s easy to pack your entire wardrobe, but she actually looked so cute and comfortable throughout the entire film. I’m super jealous of her sweater collection.

My one final thought and complaint about this film is the people in the theater. I went at midnight because of many reasons, including that I have read all of the books multiple times, I have been reading the books since I was seven years old, the series means a lot to me because of that, and I thoroughly enjoy the movies. In other words, I am a huge fan. There were people in the theater who were surprised at certain scenes that they shouldn’t have been surprised at (like when Ron returns), and who were shouting “don’t do it!” when Harry and Hermione were dancing in the tent – if they had read the books, they would have known that Hermione was upset that Ron had left and Harry was trying to comfort her, and also that Harry isn’t like that, he’s not the type to make out with his best friend’s love of life. Slash Harry and Hermione have a platonic, best friend relationship, and she’s practically the older sister he never had. So that would have been weird too. I feel like this movie is hard for people who don’t read the books to follow. It’s not like all of the other films, where the problem is explicitly stated in the beginning. It’s a part of a culmination of events that have happened throughout the series. There’s also a few things they left out that were important to the plot, so I feel like non-readers would be really confused. I’m not saying that non-readers shouldn’t see the movie – it’s an amazing film, and I think everyone should see it multiple times. I just feel that they shouldn’t go to the midnight showing, and take seats and tickets from real fans of the series who have been waiting for this movie since the book came out and who probably want to see the film more.

See this movie. It will make you laugh, it will make you cry, it will make you regret more than ever that you never got that Hogwarts letter in the mail on your eleventh birthday. It’s the best film of the series yet, and I can’t wait to see it again.

I Solemnly Swear I Am Up To No Good

November 6, 2010

It’s that time of year again! No, you fools, not Christmas time, Harry Potter time!!! Time for costumes and fake wands and drawn on scars, time for re-reading and re-watching and reviewing. Time to fall back in love and wonder why you ever read anything else, because nothing else brings you as much security and joy as this series does. The world in which you wish you lived is inviting you back, it’s beckoning, can’t you hear it? Can you hear the sound of spells being cast, of Hermione’s good judgement, of Ron’s “Oi!”? Can you hear the parseltongue slipping from Harry’s lips? You forgave it long ago for not sending you an invitation to Hogwarts on your eleventh birthday, it’s time to dive back in. Pick up your favorite book and get to reading – Harry and company miss you as much as you miss them. Hell, you’re even starting to miss that crazy sassmaster, Bellatrix. Who cares about homework when you can read about Harry not doing his? There’s a reason you can recite a history of Albus Dumbledore’s life but can’t remember a thing about King Henry VIII.

Pump yourself for the film, starting now. It’s only weeks away, but there’s still time to prepare. Get those midnight tickets ahead of time – don’t you want to see just how beautiful Gellert Grindelwald actually is? Don’t you want to see how hard watching Harry go to Godric’s Hollow will make you cry? You know you do. Pack your robes, grab your wand, get your books…it’s time to get back to Hogwarts.

Scream What-the-Hell-For?

September 23, 2010

Okay I know the title of this blog is kind of lacking, but I have to get this out.

Scream is one of my favorite horror films. Of. All. Time. I can watch it over and over again and it still scares the living crap out of me-it’s damn good. This trailer…whatisthiIdon’teven…

First of all, the cast. No, seriously, the cast. Every key actor/tress from the 2000’s is in this film-Hayden Penetierre, Emma Roberts, Lauren Graham, Adam Brody (who, by the way, IS TOTALLY SCREAM. He’s the obsessed movie buff. He’s the killer. Or, at least that’s my opinion.)-they’re trying to make it the quintessential 2000/2010’s film, just as the original was to the 1990’s. Especially with that original cast, man. I loves it! The original, I mean. Which is why I’m okay with Courtney Cox Arquette, David Arquette and Neve Cambell coming back, I mean, it’s the least they could have done considering that pretty much all of the characters always get killed off EXCEPT for those three. I bet Sidney finally dies in this film. Wait, they can’t do that! That would mean no reason for there to be yet ANOTHER addition to the series.

That’s my other problem. There is no way that this one girl could attract so many psychopaths. There were two of them in the first movie, going around and murdering people as quickly as some people finish off books or movies-it was their strange hobby. And there was that whole storyline where it intertwined with the killer’s love for movies, which made it kind of bizarre and fun, and that carried on into the other films. How can they incorporate that into this one? And will Sidney ever be able to rest? I mean really, her mother’s death, which we all know was Skeet Ulrich’s fault, was (technically) like 17 years ago at this point. And everyone linked to the death is dead and gone. They dragged in a long-lost brother for the third one-is there any one else who played a part in this devilish scheme? Is there any more mystery to be solved?

Regardless, I will be attending this film. I feel like I need to. It’s a cult thing, I guess?


September 5, 2010

Lets be real. This summer’s selection of movies was slim. I think I saw two movies that I liked, the other two that I wanted to see were out of the theaters before I could get to them. That’s my fault for being lazy when it came to Toy Story 3 but NOT for Scott Pilgrim which was in theaters for maybe two weeks, during which I was either with Jenny who didn’t want to see it or making plans to see a screening which ended up falling through. Biggest regret of the summer, probably. Maybe this is because I didn’t assert myself when I said “I want to see that movie.” What I should have told my friends and family is, “I want to see that movie and I swear to God I will drag you there if that’s what it takes to get someone to see it with me.” So, friends, that’s how it’s going to be for the next few months of movie premiers, because I have a whole line up of movies that I would very much like to see and you are going to tag along with me, whether you like it or not. And so, without further ado, I would like to present the lengthy list of movies that I WILL, without a doubt, see this year.

1. Howl

There are so many reasons fueling my desire to see this movie. Reasons #1 and #2 are James Franco and Jon Hamm. I probably don’t need to convince any of my friends to come to this with me, my mother is just as big a fan of these two actors as I am, and I know she’d enjoy this film. But there are also plenty of Franco-philes that I am close to who I know will join me for this movie just because Jamesy is in it, playing none other than the scrawny, bifocaled man himself, Allen Ginsberg. That brings me to reason #3: I had no idea there was a trial surrounding this poem. Before I saw this preview, the only thing I knew about Howl was that it was a poem that the AP English students in Mrs. Thompsons class had to read out loud, and did so quite uncomfortably. I recall Jessica and Emmy hysterically discussing how that…situation…had unfolded in each of their classes, but little did I realize that this vulgar surprise of an assignment had caused such an uproar at the time that it was written and recited. And because I don’t feel like reading lengthy Wikipedia pages, I’d prefer to watch this movie and learn about Ginsberg and the history of Howl that way. For now, I’m going to actually read the poem and see what Ms. Crane’s AP English class was missing out on.
2. The Town

Here is my thought process while watching this trailer for the first time.
“Oh jeez, masks-scary? No. Jon Hamm???? Yes, more please! Why Rastafarian skulls? Residual effects-psychological thriller maybe? My favorite. Aww, Ben Affleck playing a nice guy! Typical. I loved him in Dogma though. Bank robberies…Oceans 11…awesome. Serena? Looking like a badass ghetto chick? Kind of intriguing. Oh shit, Ben Affleck isn’t the guy I thought he was. OH MY GOD PLOT TWIST THIS LOOKS SO GOOD.”
If those aren’t enough reasons, I’m pretty sure it’s going to be at the Garden and it’s coming out Friday and there’s nothing else to see so we might as well watch this.
3. Black Swan

Did I mention that I love psychological thrillers? They’re great. They’re suspenseful. They are all…kind of the same. Well, not this time. Natalie Portman looks so anxious, on edge-I feel like I can relate as someone who is in a constant state of apprehension. And it’s about ballerinas-it just looks like a beautiful movie that will be fun, if anything, to just watch. And there’s Mila Kunis playing a villain, but not in a Jackie Burkhart way, more in a twisted, undercover villain sort of way. Like a traitor in a movie I can’t think of right now. I can’t quite place her. Maybe she’s breaking new ground in movie-villain history. I can’t believe I have to wait three months for this film. I’m so excited for it. I’ve been excited for it since I first saw this poster and nearly shit my pants because that’s got to be one of the scariest movie posters I’ve ever seen. So sinister, so dark, so…arousing to every one of my senses. It’s gonna be a good one.

4. Hesher

First things first. I love Natalie Portman, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Rainn Wilson, so I’m a little biased when it comes to this. It’s also supposedly a feel-good movie, which is something I’m a total sucker for. And the acting in this looks phenomenal just from that one promotional clip. I didn’t even recognize Natalie Portman at first and JGL, well, even with his hair stringy and parted down the middle, and even with all of that grime, and weird tattoos and a love for Iron Maiden, I’m still attracted to him and he is still awe-inspiring. Maybe it’s just that the characters he chooses to play are so adorable and/or lovable in their own right, but I’ve loved everything I’ve ever seen JGL in and this movie will surely be no exception. They haven’t announced a release date for it, but I’ve got my eyes peeled for more trailers and information. This is just a small taste of the movie, and I want a much bigger bite.


February 11, 2010

Because of my job as a camp counselor who works with 30 or so seven-year-olds for two months in the summer, I’ve watched Toy Story (the original) quite often in my adolescence. Therefore, the movie which I am most excited for this year is, in all honesty, Toy Story 3. Seriously. It’s going to be so much fun!

I could criticize Disney for being unoriginal, however I adore both the first and second movies in this series, perhaps it’s better for them to go with something that they know everyone will want to see instead of taking chances. That brings up the question: has Disney/Pixar ever done anything wrong? Well, let’s see.

Their latest creation, Up, has been nominated for best picture at the Oscars this year. When I saw it in theaters with my parents last year, it made my mother cry very hard and my father laugh very loud. All of my campers gave it five stars.

Wall-E, my personal favorite of the bunch, is about an adorable little robot who cannot talk and his efforts to save the earth and the increasingly oversized humans who are being held captive on a utopian spaceship. It won the Oscar for Best Animated Film, and won my campers complete attention when we got stuck inside on a rainy summer’s day.

Who could resist that face?

The story of Ratatouille is lighthearted yet suspenseful, and tells a Grinch-like tale with the villainous character’s heart growing three sizes. It’s a really beautifully made piece, and is often playing in my dentist’s office, it’s in such high demand. Kind of like a heaping plate of the dish which is also the namesake of the movie, this is one film that is perfect every time.

Cars is not my favorite of the Pixar clan, but if the amount of Cars-inspired and related merchandise that my baby cousin owns (Crocs, lunchboxes, innumerable books, bubble machines, to name a few) tells me anything, it’s that this movie is well-loved by children.

If there is one Pixar movie that is always on the television, it’s The Incredibles, one of the more amusing superhero movies that I’ve ever seen. And I’ve seen a lot of superhero movies. It’s funny, sweet and very family-friendly. I haven’t seen this one for a long time, but what I do remember is a crazy-imaginative alternative superhero world and a pseudo-villain who was genuinely psycho. Perhaps that is why this is the only Pixar movie that earned itself a PG rating. Hmm..

Considering how many people still quote Finding Nemo, I have no reason to question it’s success. However,  I have seen it far too many times in my life for it to be enjoyable right now.

Because of this movie, everyone automatically assumes that anyone named Bruce is Australian. Disney, what have you done?

Monsters, Inc. is, in my opinion, one of the most underrated Pixar movies. In my pre-pre-teen years, it was arguably one of the funniest movies I had ever seen. Boo is also the cutest little girl I have ever seen-this may have been one of the first movies to make me cry of sorrow.  No one ever watches this anymore! I’m going to pop this one in next summer. I have a feeling that a lot of people missed this movie, and deserve to watch it at least once in their lives.

There were many reasons why I liked Toy Story 2; Wendy, the Barbies, the fact that Buzz and Woody had a common enemy this time and weren’t fighting with one another. They really did the sequel well, considering what a classic the original is. Everyone enjoyed it. It’s kind of like the first two Godfather movies-they work well together, and are almost as good as each other. Here’s to hoping that the third movie is just as good.

All I have to say about A Bug’s Life is that the “poo-poo platter” line NEVER GETS OLD. Ever. It wasn’t old the first thirty times I watched it and it still wasn’t old last year when I watched it while getting a echocardiogram. They really hit the nail on the head with the male ladybug. Instant classic.

The first Disney/Pixar collaboration was the timeless Toy Story, the original tale of toys come to life and the struggles to be top dog in the world of plastic. It won the hearts of people globally, and changed the way I looked at my toys in the middle of the night. It also started a franchise which is still going strong today-as we can see with that very intriguing preview that I posted above. Here’s to Woody, Buzz & Co. and the best of wishes with their new movie. It had better be good.

No pressure.

Best of luck my boys.